Category Archives: self-pep talk

Taking an inventory

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As if weight gain, sleep apnea and loss of fluid movement weren’t enough to make me wake up and smell the coffee and become motivated about my weight loss, little reminders have been popping up everywhere lately.

Aside from the hypothyroidism and breakouts (currently looking for a good blackhead treatment.), I found out that I am anemic. Boy oh boy. When I found this out today, I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream at myself and shake my fists and run around every block imaginable until I passed out from exhaustion. After all… who is to blame for this? Me. My body is protesting y’all.

So… I sat down and took inventory of life as I know it right now… and life as I knew it 5 or 6 months ago. I know that I have changed. I know that my attitude has changed. But why? I don’t look at medical conditions a viable excuse for me. Because, I have to work around that. I can’t just let that be my personal truth and give up. Know what I mean?

And then… I watched The Biggest Loser. Elizabeth from the black team had a revelation this week. And the revelation was surviving versus thriving. She pointed out that her whole life had been about surviving. She survived abusive relationships, overbearing parents and siblings and always feeling sheltered. She said that she fought everyday to survive. Jillian pointed out that surviving was not fighting; thriving is fighting. (man, I heart Jillian! She kicks so much ass!)

And I recognized in that moment that “surviving” is exactly what I had been doing myself. I wasn’t fighting. I did just enough to get through each day. I know… that doing “just enough” was not enough / is not enough.

(note: I lost 5 pounds this week. I think the medicine is working! WOOHOO! :) )

It feels good to do something about your weight. Doesn’t it?!

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I have always firmly believed that when we truly put our best foot forward in life, we feel happy and accomplished. This philosophy applies to weight loss as well. When we are taking care of the thing that bothers us most about our life… health…money… etc. we get to take giant steps forward to get to where we want to be and need to be.

When I take care of myself, I feel happy. I feel accomplished. I feel good about *me*.

If you have a longer journey (100+ pounds to lose or more), then you have figured out that it takes awhile before you visually reap the benefits of getting healthy. That’s why it is so crucial to focus on how you feel. Ask yourself this: When you get a workout in do you feel accomplished and happier? When you make healthy food choices do you feel that you have gained some of your power back?

There have been a few points in my own life where I felt powerless around food. I would self-sabotage in the name of pacification and before I knew it, I would be staring down at the silver lining of an empty chip bag (kind of ironic how a silver-lining isn’t always a good thing. heh.). There was a time when I would purposely order more food than I could eat from a favorite pizza place and manage to eat all of it (even though I started to feel sick somewhere in the middle of eating all of that food). I enjoyed eating alone because then I wouldn’t have to face up to uncomfortable looks or the off-chance of a snide comment. I also enjoyed eating alone because then I didn’t have to hide how much I ate.

I have started to mentally talk to myself when I feel discouraged. Mental pep-talks seem to help a lot! In a frustrated moment I ask myself… “How can I see this differently?” and “When I look back on this later… what is it about this moment that I want to remember? That I gave up on myself or that I pushed through the feelings?”

Revel in the feeling that you are doing something about your weight issues. Whether you have taken the first step or are on the 50th step in your journey…remember that you are doing something about this. You may not be where you want to be yet. But you are doing it. :)