Archive for the ‘Weight Watchers’ Category

I wish I could buy memory for my laptop. I have so many programs open at one time, that I use most of my resources without really meaning to. Most PCs and Laptops and Macs tap out at a certain number. For instance, the laptop I am on currently can only have up to 4Gb of memory on it.

It sounds like a lot… and in reality it is a lot. However, sometimes it certainly doesn’t seem like a lot!

It is so easy to get caught up in the hype of weight loss.

What do I mean?  Well, it is easy to promise ourselves (either silently or publicly) that we are going to work out 7 days a week for an hour or two at a time, eat *only* the healthiest of foods (shunning all other food), and be down to that perfect size in a matter of a few months.

Rigid.  That is the only way to describe what I have written above.  A rigid diet and exercise routine is something we all try to incorporate after we catch the “weight-loss bug”.  The fact of the matter is, obtaining a healthy lifestyle and losing that unwanted weight does not happen overnight.  Perfection does not happen overnight.  After all, when we started to want to lose weight we were either at the point of rock bottom or close to it.  We felt unhappy with our bodies, our confidence and self-esteem in general took a nosedive and everyday became a “fat” day.

Believe me when I tell you that I was all caught up in the hype.  I ran out and bought a gym membership and vowed to workout 7 days a week.  I practiced a rigid diet for the first few weeks… not allowing any wiggle room for human error or slip-ups.

The thing is… I spent the last 5 years dealing with subsequent pregnancies, stress-eating and pretty much putting my body and health in the tanker.  When I started, I expected to pick up where I left off when I lost 70 pounds (or so) the first time.  I expected to hop on the bike trail and ride like I never left.  I expected to jump back in to the disciplined and controlled mindset I had toward food.

The truth?  I fell a bit short of those expectations.  I had 5 years of bad habits, stinkin’ thinkin’ and lack-of-activity to untangle myself from.  I tried to jump back in whole-hog and found that it was a bit tough.  I had to struggle with myself a bit before making progress.  And believe it or not… the progress I felt I needed to make was not necessarily on the scale… but more or less inside.  I needed to feel like I had wholeheartedly embraced my new lifestyle and new habits.  Until I did… I knew that I would be doing a whole lot of  *fake-it-’till-you-make-it*.

What I have discovered is that I don’t need to be perfect at this.  I don’t need to lose x-amount of weight in x-amount of time in order to feel like I have accomplished something or righted all of the wrongs in my life.  I just needed to start making changes.  The rest falls into place from there.

The weight?  Yeah… it’s kind of falling off slowly.  I have lost about 1.2 pounds a week (if you average it out).  But you know what?  I’m not the same person I was 20 pounds ago.  Regardless of how long it took, I am damn proud of that accomplishment.  As for the rest of the weight?  I am more determined than ever to see this journey to the finish line!

So what did I do?  I got real with myself.  I decided to celebrate the little steps I made toward better health.  I stopped dogging myself for the things I didn’t do and started celebrating the things I did do.  I sat down and made a list of realistic goals or steps toward the betterment of my health.  For instance, right now I just can’t do an hour of exercise once a day, 7 days a week.  So, I have opted to take half hour walks everyday and/or bike ride for an hour 3 times a week.  You know what I found?  I am actually pushing myself to do more.  When I scheduled more exercise, it seemed I did less.  When I scheduled less exercise, I found I was able to do more.  I believe it is because I got real with myself and didn’t overwhelm with unrealistic expectations.

In short, be realistic with your expectations on this journey.  Allow yourself some time to build up to your idea of weight-loss perfection.  If something isn’t working… don’t feel guilty about it.  Change it up.  Find what works for you.  Also, keep in mind that every step you take toward better health, even if you think it is a small step, is in reality a HUGE step.

Well, I weighed myself this morning and found that I lost 2.8 pounds!  Yay me!  So that tells me that I must have been retaining water.  Or something.  Isn’t it funny how the scale fluctuates sometimes day by day?

I did go on my bike ride yesterday as I said I would.  Hubs watched the kids and I went by myself.  I was able to kick out 7.2 miles (1 mile more than I did yesterday).  It was refreshing!  Although, I didn’t really think about anything.  I just let my mind wander and really got into my music.  It was good to be able to go into my own little world.

So this leads me to a couple of questions to any of my fellow moms who may read this:

Do you experience mommy guilt?  If so, how have you been able to get over it for the sake of your journey?

Let me ’splain.  You see, I am a stay-at-home mom.  I spend 24 hours a day and 365 days a year of my existence with my kids.  I love my kids.  They are my world.  However, I go through phases of mommy-burn-out.  Usually this happens when the mommy-guilt comes on and as a result I stop taking care of myself because I think I am taking something away from my kids by doing so.  (I know what you are thinking…. that’s a good example of Stinkin’ Thinkin’, right?)

The thing is… I am getting over it.  It is not easy to get over (the guilt that is) but at the end of the day I recognize that I need to take care of myself.  If momma ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy.  Know what I mean?  And besides, taking care of myself isn’t selfish.  NOT taking care of myself is very selfish.  But taking care of me is as essential to my family’s daily routine as taking care of them is.

And I see the benefit of this new lifestyle, not only for myself but for my family.  Owen (my oldest), is making very good distinctions between what is healthy and what isn’t.  A few months ago, he might have complained that I only packed him an apple for a snack (instead of some crunchy, sugary stuff with a character on the front of the package).  Now, he is excited about it.

The same thing with exercise.  I was a card-carrying couch potato at one point.  My kids had all of this energy and nowhere to put it because *I* was too tired to do fun things with them.  If I couldn’t fence them in (so that I didn’t have to get up, naturally) then I didn’t want any part of the activity.  Now, we go places. We go for walks, bike rides and to the park.  I want to be as active as possible.

Knowing that I am including my family in this is refreshing and makes me happy.  Including them as much as I can (but not so much that I can’t concentrate on myself when I need to) is the sword that cuts the guilt.  We all need to preserve ourselves sometimes and that is OK.

My AHA! Moment of the day:  I always thought that if I did for myself and not for others then that would make me a bad person.  But I realize that I need to do for myself otherwise I won’t be good for others.  And that I am a good person regardless.

Now tell me… do you have any weird tales about your scale?  How do you get over your mommy guilt?